


Parallels

by septemberserenades



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, ziam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-26
Updated: 2012-12-26
Packaged: 2017-11-22 11:25:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/609303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/septemberserenades/pseuds/septemberserenades
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing about Liam is that he and Harry are two different people. Sometimes the situations they got into would seem quite similar, and it always raises a suspicion in Zayn that Liam and him will end up exactly like how he and Harry did, but then the younger boy will say something that makes him realize that no, it won’t.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Parallels

When it finally happens, Zayn couldn’t honestly say that he was surprised. To be truthful, he had been expecting this to occur a long time ago. He’s just shocked it didn’t happen sooner. But maybe that was his mistake, maybe he shouldn’t have dragged it out until the end when everything would just explode and it would all end up in a sorry mess.

He doesn’t remember exactly what they were fighting about. All he knows is that he came back late from the bar, and Harry had pushed him out of their flat as he yelled at him about something along the lines of “having enough of putting up with you.”

Harry had already packed all of his clothes in his old duffel bag. A few sharp objects were aimed at his head on the way out that aren’t really meant to hit him. He knows that if he really wanted to, the curly haired teen would have aimed a lot better, thrown much heavier objects, and probably cause some lasting damage on him that he would have to get stitches for. Which is why when Harry starts yelling and screaming at him to get out and never return, he hightails it out of there without so much as a glance behind him, before the younger boy could get really mad.

It didn’t last long, their relationship. Less than half a year passed before they started falling apart. They’ve been going at each other for weeks until Harry apparently decided he had enough.

Zayn had thought what they had might have had something special, because it was the first time he started a relationship with someone as good friends before later transitioning on to something more (All of his past relationships were more just casual hook ups that resulted in a few dates later on before he decided to end things). If that’s what he could call it. Zayn doesn’t know what to call them, because they’ve never outright stated that they were a couple, but the things that they did were plenty enough to say otherwise, from the tender kisses at day to the steamy sessions on the bed at night. One thing, he notes, however, was that they never said “I love you” to each other.

When they turned sixteen, Harry offered him a place to stay while they went to uni, possibly suggesting they spend some more time with each other. With nothing else better to do, he had replied with a nonchalant yes, a “sure, why not” with a shrug of his shoulders. Harry had seemed a little put off by his answer, but at that time Zayn didn’t realize why, and days later when he finally did, he couldn’t bring himself to even bother trying to fix it.

They had been okay at first. They still had good times together, and they got along fairly well, but as time progressed, their patience with each other wore thin. They spent too much time together perhaps, or maybe they were just never meant to be. Either way, it soon enough became clear that a day couldn’t pass by without one of them yelling at each other for some petty reason, like leaving a sock on the floor, or forgetting to do the dishes. And instead of lying next to each other at night on the mattress like they used to, Zayn would grumble as he attempted to fall asleep on his makeshift bed on the couch, while Harry slept in his room with the door locked.

Sometimes days would go by without either of them ever seeing each other. They made excuses not to be home, or to go out with each other, or even speak. He remembers that they once went a whole week without trading a word, just because neither of them wanted to say anything, as if they both knew that if they did, it would only end in a fight.

As Zayn had watched their relationship slowly crumble, he sort of hated himself for not choosing to be confrontational about it and rather opting to letting it be. Instead of talking to each other and trying to work things out, he took a step back and watched from afar as everything fell to pieces. He feels like a coward for not trying.

But then again, it wasn’t like Harry ever attempted to do so either, and that was enough reason for him to not even bother. 

A small part of him knows that the reason why he never bothered to try to make up with him was because that he knew that it would never work out anyways. Before they moved in together, they didn’t have to deal with each other constantly, and things were okay until then. It was only when they were forced to be so close that the bad started showing. He was just too easy to anger, and Harry was just too easily upset, and that never meshed well together.

He’s walking down a lonely path, taking in his surroundings as he tries to contemplate what to do. It’s well past midnight, and no one else is on the streets. Most of the lights are off, and all he can see are stars. For once, he’s glad that he lives in such a rural area. He usually liked to complain about how there was nothing to do in the faraway town they lived in, how hard it was to find anything the least bit entertaining, but in reality he loved the quiet serenity that you could never get in the loud and bustling cities of urbanization.

In the dead of night when there’s no one on the streets, and everything is quiet, Zayn feels like the whole world is his, and he can pretend that it’s only him that’s there. The echoes of his footsteps resound throughout the air, and it makes him feel all the more alone. Some people are afraid of loneliness, but he likes the privacy.

Somehow he ends up in a park, a place he thinks he’s passed by once or twice before, but he’s not really sure. Either way, he doesn’t have enough money to afford a motel, and the only thing that deems worthy to be even considered a bed is the bench that he’s sitting on. He lies down and tries to get comfortable, because hell, he might as well make the best out of it.

Because the bench is so stiff and unpleasant to sleep on, Zayn spends a good time of the night just looking at the stars. He’s surprisingly calm considering he was just kicked out of his flat and currently has no roof to live under. He knows he should be worried about himself, but looking at the night sky, he can’t help but admire the starry canvas, and thinks that maybe sleeping under the stars for the rest of his life wouldn’t be so bad after all.

He doesn’t remember whatever he thought about after that, because he falls asleep and when he wakes up, it’s not on his own accord. His eyes open to a sort of mild sunlight, the kind that you could only see when it was the early hours of the morning.

At first he thinks it might be a park ranger or something, telling him to get out of the park because they didn’t allow homeless people to sleep there. It’s the only reason anyone would bother talking to him.

Instead, he sees a pair of chocolate eyes looking back at him. And even though it’s cold and in the dead of winter, the warmth that radiates from them is enough to make his body melt on the inside. The eyes belong to a boy his age, with sandy brown hair and a kindly face. His breath hitches for a second, because he’s never felt like this just from looking at someone, but he manages to sputter out a single word.

“What?”

To his surprise, the stranger doesn’t tell him to leave.

Instead, he asks, “Do you have a place to stay?”

Zayn is usually a very private person, and the last thing he would ever do was disclose personal information to strangers, but there was just something about this boy that makes him want to tell him the truth.

“No, I got kicked out by my flatmate.”

Not everything though. He doesn’t need to know that Harry is his sort of lover. Or at least he was anyways.

The stranger’s eyes look at him in sympathy. “Oh, that seems kind of harsh.”

He shrugs, acting like he really doesn’t care. Actually, he’s more surprised that this person is talking to him and asking if he’s okay. He knows it’s not obvious yet that he’s technically homeless. He’s bathed recently and there isn’t a haggard expression on his face that may suggest he was drunk or on drugs, but he doubts that normal people would ask someone sleeping on the streets if they had a place to stay.

However this stranger decides to surprise him even more.

“If you want, you can stay at my place.”

He hides the shocked expression on his face, and he thanks god that he’s so good at it, because otherwise his eyebrows probably would have raised to a comical height and this stranger would just look at him funny. But honestly, what person offered strangers their homes to reside in without so much as an interrogation?

“It’s nothing especially big really, it’s just my roommate is going to be gone for a while and if you need someplace to sleep you can take his room until you find somewhere else to stay. Erm, that’s only if you want to, of course.”

The offer is like a godsend, and it’s almost so convenient and remarkable that for a second he doubts it’s true. He’s waiting for the boy to laugh at his face, saying that he’s just joking and that it was ridiculous for him to even consider for even a moment that he was being serious about the offer, but the stranger looks at him with sincere eyes. Although they do look slightly nervous, and it takes him a moment to realize he still has to respond.

“That would be great actually.”

The boy smiles at him. “Great. My name’s Liam, nice to meet you.”

 

Liam is still a student, and he makes most of his money at a part time job at a restaurant, something to help pay for his half of the bills while his MIA roommate paid for the other. Even though Liam says he doesn’t have to, Zayn contributes his own worth as well, working the odd job here and there. It’s not much, but it’ll have to do.

 

It had occurred to him that he should save up and try to look for a place on his own, considering that Liam’s offer was not meant to last for an infinite time, but the younger boy never pushes him about it, and frankly, he doesn’t really want to leave.

 

They fall into an easy rhythm after their first meeting. He moves into the room next to Liam’s, and they quickly become friends after that. It wasn’t hard; Liam, despite being a completely different person, Zayn learns, shared many similarities with him.

 

He discovers Liam is a very organized person. Everything has to be planned out, and he was always constantly reminding him of what he had to get done. Very dependent, a good person to rely on, and Zayn appreciates that, because often times he just needs to let things go and go crazy, leave it to someone else to take care of him in his instances of carelessness.

The first time he calls Liam from the club in the middle of the night, too drunk to drive but still sober enough to call someone for a ride, he expects Liam to be angry with him, and tell him off for not informing him beforehand that he would be out. Instead, the sandy haired teen comes to pick him up without so much as a complaint, and even tucks him in the bed at night, a glass of water and some aspirin on the night side table waiting for him and his horrible hangover when he woke up.

He feels guilty for making Liam come and look after him and worry about his whereabouts, when he realized that the younger boy had been waiting for him the whole night to return or make a call. But later Zayn realizes that Liam never really minds watching over him, it was in his nature to do so, as well as worrying.

It’s the first time he’s ever actually felt like someone was concerned about him, he realizes. Someone who would actually give a damn about where he was and what he was doing. Looking at all the missed calls on his phone, a drastic change from the total lack of messages he got from Harry on his nightly excursions, he realized that Liam actually cared.

(Maybe that was what he always wanted after all: someone to show him that they cared. It might seem a little suffocating, but at least that meant they worried about what would happen to you.)

Liam will always incessantly worry about him, but he makes it a point to never go out without ever telling him first.

 

They both have two sides to their personality. Zayn could be silent and brooding, or completely wild and outrageous, depending on his mood and if he was close to the people he was with at the moment. Liam is responsible and serious, but at the same time childish and naïve.

They are both, however, rather private people, who don’t like to express their emotions. But somehow they find a way to confide in each other, when the older teen grows tired of the ridiculous expectations the world has set up for them and needs to let things out, and Liam will always sit there quietly and be there to listen. He remembers every little thing he says, and it makes him feel like he’s actually worth listening to.

(Later he recalls how Harry would sit there and listen, but not really. He would always lose focus long before he was done with voicing his thoughts, because apparently even the most eloquent of wording he could come up with was not enough to keep his attention.

 

Zayn knows he’s forgetful, one or two of his chores always left undone and never realizing it until the younger boy grumbles about it, telling him that once again he forgot something. But instead of arguing about it like Harry would have, he just goes and does it for him. He pretends that he’s mad, but they have enough of a mutual understanding of each other that Zayn knows Liam actually doesn’t really mind.

 

They’re both quiet people, and although Liam knows how to make polite conversation and starts to ramble sometimes when he’s starting a certain subject, they share a common appreciation for the silence that comes along with peace. Just like with Harry, they could go days without talking, but for Liam it’s different. They’re not angry; they just don’t need to say words aloud to converse with each other. Simple actions like the squeeze of a knee, or a nod of their head could speak volumes.

Sometimes they spend the whole day watching movies, and he’s resting his head on Liam’s chest like he’s some sort of pillow. Liam just lets him, and he never complains. They spend those kinds of days in silence, and Zayn appreciates the peace.

Other days he’ll lock himself to in his room, either listening to music or working on a sketch that he’s been thinking about doing for days. On those days Liam lets him be. He doesn’t bother him or asks him if he wants to go out. He makes sure he’s okay occasionally though, peeking in through the door and leaving his dinner on his nightstand or something, but he never interrupts him.

Harry would have grown bored and forced him to go out, claiming that he was acting like a recluse and bringing him to a club. And while he appreciates the thought that Harry was just doing what he thought was best, (and he did usually end up having a good time) he just wishes Harry had let him be, because he needs his privacy. Harry doesn’t understand, he takes it personally and thinks that Zayn is trying to distance himself away from him. But Liam does. And that’s what was different about them.

 

Zayn can’t help constantly comparing and contrasting Liam and Harry. He knows it’s probably not very healthy, and he doubts it because he’s not over Harry. It’s just that the parallels that occur between the two are almost scary. They’re very similar in what they do, but at the same time, they’re completely different.

 

Once again Zayn doesn’t know what he’s in. Liam and he have become closer, much more intimate and touchy feely with one another, and yet again neither boy ever decides to talk about it, lets it continue on as they both wonder is there is ever going to be anything more.

With Liam it’s different because they’ve never slept together. They’ve done plenty of other things though, like cuddling and kissing (granted, it’s him doing all the kissing, and they’re not even passionate ones. Just pecks on the cheek or a slight brush of lips). And Liam would have to be blind to not notice whenever the longing stares he sent his way (but then again, the sandy haired teen never reacted to the wanting looks. Maybe he was just that oblivious).

Sometimes he feels like Liam might actually have some feelings for him, the way that he talks about him so appraisingly and as if he regarded him as if he had been placed on a pedestal, but then he’ll do something that makes Zayn question if anything they share is ever beyond platonic.

He doesn’t know if he really wants to be with Liam. He recognizes that something is going on between them, that they’ve been slowly gravitating toward each other ever since they met and he could actually do something that would force Liam to address it, and maybe they could finally be together, but he’s never been big on taking risks, and he doesn’t want to start now. They have a very good friendship, and he doesn’t want to ruin it like he did with Harry by trying to spark a relationship out of it.

 

On certain days Liam would come home (yes, he calls his shared flat with Liam home now, but really anyplace with Liam there would be home for him) with little intricacies, small things that would make him smile.

Sometimes it’s a little handmade bouquet, the scent sweet and refreshing that he can’t help bringing it to his nose and taking in the aroma. Other times he would bring back some art supplies, something like a pack of new color pencils or a sketchbook exactly when he needed one. Looking at the quality of the materials, he knows that it was highly likely Liam just stepped into an art store and bought the most expensive brand he could find. It’s not that he thinks he can buy his friendship or anything, Zayn knows that. He’s sure that Liam honestly believes the most expensive labels are the highest quality materials, and Liam only ever believed in giving the best. 

Other times they’re not really physical items, but instead things that made him think. He comes home with riddles, and Zayn would ponder what the answer is for a whole day. He would always get excited when he thought that he got the right answer, but half the time when he went up to Liam to tell him, the younger boy would reply “I don’t know,” and it would drive him insane (but in a good way, because he got a good laugh from it anyhow).

They could be cryptic quotes that had a hidden meaning, and at the end of the day he and Liam would sit on the couch and talk about what they thought it meant (actually, it was more of him telling Liam what he thought they meant. The sandy haired teen said he was never good at these kinds of things, and really he just wanted to hear Zayn talk).

He loves Liam’s little gifts to him because they are so personal, so him. It’s like Liam knew the real him, even though they’ve only known each other for a few months (when in reality they act like they’ve known each other for years).

Harry used to get him little gifts too, always the believer in spontaneity. Except the things he brought back, while interesting for a short while, never really piqued his interest as much as Liam’s, and often times they would lie forgotten in a drawer.

(The problem with Harry is that while he has the best intentions at heart, he ends up more often than not giving others thing he would like, and unfortunately for Zayn, he and Harry like completely different things.)

 

It shouldn’t have been a surprise when he sees Harry with someone else by his side a few months after being kicked out from their flat. He still lives in the same town after all, and it would only be a matter of time before Harry moved on and found himself someone else (honestly, he’s pretty sure Harry was ready to move on a long time ago).

It’s not that he was jealous or anything (yes, he was a possessive person, but he’s known for a while that Harry was never his). He had gotten over him a long time ago. He wasn’t envious of the older looking boy with feathered brown hair standing by his side, whispering something in Harry’s ear that made him smile. The same older boy, he realizes, that Harry was with before they started living together.

(He doesn’t know much about him, never even met him. In fact, he doesn’t even know his name. All he did know was that they dated while he and Harry were still only friends, and when they split up for reasons unknown, it was Zayn who Harry went to for comfort. That’s how they started their relationship.)

It’s just that the thought of being replaced hurt. He knows that he never really had a place in Harry’s heart, not in the way that it should have been considering what they had done together. But seeing someone taking his spot next to Harry’s side, holding onto his waist and resting his chin on his shoulder, and the curly haired teen looking that much happier and more alive reminds him that he will always be a second choice.

Harry doesn’t see him, and Zayn keeps it that way. He immediately walks away in the opposite direction, ducking his head so as to not catch their attention. He doesn’t turn back to have another look, but the last thing he hears from the two is the sound of Harry laughing, and it’s the happiest he’s ever heard him in a long time.

 

Zayn realizes that he needs to stop comparing Liam to Harry all the time. They’re two different people, and it’s not right that he constantly notes how they’re so similar and different. He tells himself to not do it anymore, because Liam deserves better than that.

He goes back into their apartment, feeling tired and just wanting to go to bed, but the first thing he hears as he enters is the sound of an unfamiliar voice and loud laughter. Curious, he peers through the door. He didn’t know that Liam was having company over.

He looks to see that there’s a blonde sitting on his spot on the couch, next to Liam who seems like he was laughing hysterically at something that the stranger had said. Seeing Zayn walk through the door way, he immediately straightens out, although there’s a slight quiver in his lips as he’s speaking.

“Oh hey Zayn, this is Niall, the roommate I’ve always talked about.” Except no, not really, because he barely remembers Liam even mentioning his name, and for a while he had completely forgotten about his existence. His sudden reappearance comes as shock to him, like a bucket of cold water being thrown at his face.

Niall shoots him a bright grin, and Zayn can practically feel the friendliness radiating from him, but he can’t help but feel uncomfortable under his gaze.

“What’s up mate? Sorry to barge in on you like this, the person I was staying with until now is going away for a while.”

Niall explains that he usually stays with this guy named Josh or something, but with him gone he didn’t feel like staying in an empty apartment.

“It’s sooo boring,” he whines.

Liam snorts. “Yeah right. We all know that you only come here because you’re scared of living alone.”

“Do not!”

As they bicker like little kids, wrestling with each other on the couch, Zayn can’t help feeling highly uncomfortable as he watches, because he feels like he doesn’t belong and he just wants to leave, but he can’t because he knows that Liam would be disappointed if he did. The younger boy wants them to get to know each other, try to be friends even. Niall asks him some questions in an attempt to get to know him better, but all of his answers are short and cold.

For a while he just opts to stare at the TV for the rest of the night as the two catch up. The only time he takes part in the conversation is when they ask him what topping he wants on the pizza they were ordering for dinner. Zayn pretends to focus on the reality show that’s on the telly, but he finds himself constantly glancing back at the pair, noting how happy Liam looks, and how effortlessly they melt into each other like they belonged together.

There’s a heavy weight in his stomach, something deep inside of him that makes his expression dark. He’s upset, and he doesn’t know why (but at the same time he does. He knows he’s jealous of Niall. He doesn’t like anyone being so close to Liam, but he doesn’t want to admit that he likes him, that what he feels for him is anything more than platonic, because he doesn’t want to get disappointed again).

Finally he can’t take it anymore. He excuses himself early for the night, saying that he’s tired. Really, he just wants to get away and not have to see Liam and Niall practically cuddling right in front of him. Seeing them together retells him how easily replaced he can be, and he doesn’t need another reminder of that.

The first thing he does as he goes back to his, (or rather, Niall’s) room is grab his duffel bag and start packing everything. He doesn’t need to see anymore, he knows that he’s overstayed his welcome. Niall was back now, and it’s time that he leave. He saw how those two acted, he wasn’t blind. They don’t need him there. Besides, it’s not like Liam would even miss him, he had already been replaced.

Or maybe he was only meant to be a temporary replacement this entire time. Just like with Harry.

He wants to smack himself for doing it again, comparing Harry and Liam. Instead, however, he chooses to roughly jam his clothes into his bag, making a mess but he can’t bring himself to care. He must have been a lot untidier than he thought, because he’s actually having trouble finding all of his clothes, the way that they’re strewn about the entire room.

“What are you doing?”

The raven haired teen looks up, and it’s the first time he notices that Liam had entered the room. He was in such a deep thought he didn’t notice anyone come in.

He answers as casually as he can. “What does it look like I’m doing? Packing.”

“Why?” Liam splutters, looking honestly confused.

“Well obviously, Niall is back, and I was only supposed to stay until he did. You and Niall don’t need me around, so I-“

“Do you have a place to stay?”

“I- what?”

“Do you have a place to stay?” Liam repeats.

It puts him off because he remembers that as the first thing that Liam ever said to him, the seven words that changed his life. Call him cheesy, but the younger boy was probably the best thing that ever happened to him, and he doesn’t think he could ever forget him, even if he tried.

“I-I…”

“Do you really hate living with me that much?” Liam looks at him with such sad eyes that a pang of guilt courses through his body, and he’s stumbling to fix his words. He forgets that he was just considering leaving, because all that he can think about is getting that kicked puppy expression off his face.

“No I mean, it’s just that since Niall’s back I have no place to stay…”

“I was going to offer that you share a room with me. My bed is big enough for both of us. Unless, of course, you prefer the couch…”

“Um, no, that’s okay. I’m fine sharing, if that’s alright with you.”

He doesn’t know what he’s thinking when he says yes, but he does, and when he packs his bags, this time he’s not moving to someplace far away. This time, he moves down the hallway and to the next room.

When they go to sleep that night, after hesitating for just a second, Zayn wraps his arms around Liam, holding him tight and taking in the familiar warmth. He wishes that every moment could be like this, where they’re side by side and there’s nothing separating them, but he doesn’t complain. He’ll take what he can get, and when Liam returns the embrace, clutching his shirt slightly in his sleep and moving closer to him until their faces are only inches apart, Zayn can’t help the satisfied smile that’s spreading across his face.

He digs his face into his chest, and he can still smell the lingering scent of Liam’s aftershave. In that little moment, when it’s just the two of them and it’s like there’s no one else in the world but them, he feels like Liam is his.

Later, Zayn warms up to Niall, which isn’t very hard. He’s so carefree and bubbly that it’s hard for him not to like the blonde. They’re friends almost instantly, and Zayn can’t pull himself away from the blonde’s endearing personality. In a short time, Niall becomes a sort of little brother to him. He feels bad that he wasn’t nicer to him on their first meeting.

Liam’s glad that they get along so well, even though he jokes that it seems like they get along better than he does with either of them. Zayn laughs along, but inside he says ‘No, that would never happen. You’ll always have a special place in my heart that doesn’t belong to anyone else.’

Niall leaves to go back to Josh’s a week later, but Zayn still shares a bed with Liam.

 

The thing about Liam is that he and Harry are two different people. Sometimes the situations they got into would seem quite similar, and it always raises a suspicion in him that Liam and him will end up exactly like how he and Harry did, but then the younger boy will say something that makes him realize that, no, it won’t. Zayn will never be his second choice, and he’d never replace him with anyone else; no matter how many times Zayn thinks he is.

 

The day that Liam says “I love you” is exactly one year after they meet. It doesn’t even happen suddenly during a dramatic moment, a random outburst that’s meant to surprise more than be touching. That’s more Harry’s type of thing, making an announcement out of it and extravagating it with lavishness. For Liam, it happens gradually. What they have builds up until neither of them can deny that there’s something going on, and then it’s just the perfect time to say it.

The sandy haired teen decided that the day was a special occasion, insisting that he take Zayn out for dinner. They end up going to a nice Italian restaurant, where Liam orders the mussels and Zayn orders the same thing just because he doesn’t know what else to order, and Liam giggles as he has to help him eat them because honestly, he’s never eaten a mussel before in his life.

They go back home and Zayn is slightly tipsy from the wine, and he uses it as an excuse to hold onto Liam and pushing their bodies together. He’s just rambling on about some nonsense that makes Liam laugh, when the younger boy, in between his fits of laughter, says “I love you so much.”

“What?” he asks, because he isn’t quite sure he heard right.

“I said I love you.” Liam repeats, giving him one of his genuine smiles, where his eyes crinkle up and his mouth is curved upwards so much that it looks like he just can’t ever stop smiling. He just looks so sincerely happy, and Zayn thinks that he has never looked any more beautiful than right at that moment. “I don’t know what life would be like without you, because you just make every day seem so special. I’m so glad we met.”

And then Liam captures Zayn’s lips with his own.

He’s a little surprised, because he never expected that the sandy haired teen would ever think of him as anything more than a friend. He’s always had his suspicions, but he never expected that Liam would ever act on it.

“I love you,” he says once more, kissing him again.

And just like that, the younger teen erases every single insecurity that he has about himself. For once, Zayn knows. Liam knows the exact right thing to say to make him feel like someone important, showering him with sweet words and compliments that make his day. He’s usually a private person, never the type to voice his thoughts aloud. Liam’s a bit more open with himself, and somehow, that’s perfect for him, because he doesn’t need to voice or show his worries for the younger boy to say something that will automatically make him feel better. Not like Harry who needs a cue for him to ever act on anything, who’s too afraid of taking a risk or assuming things.

Liam, Zayn reminds himself, will never be Harry, and that’s okay, because that just means that they’re all the more meant to be together.

“I love you too.”

 

The next time Zayn sees Harry again, it’s Harry who comes up to him to exchange a few words. He wasn’t expecting it really, he was just having a smoke while he was waiting for Liam to pick him up when the younger teen ambled on over. A few months ago he would have been uncomfortable in his presence, and would have probably tried to avoid any contact, but he’s come to terms with himself and now he’s alright with being in the younger boy’s presence again.

“Hey. Long time, no see huh?” the curly haired teen says, a nervous smile on his cherubic face.

“Yeah , I guess. How’s it been?”

“Good, good. You?”

“Life’s been pretty good, yeah. You sharing that flat with anybody else now?” he asks, although he already knows the answer.

“Oh yeah, I got back together with Louis, he’s great.” So that was his name. Louis. “We’re both really happy. Life’s been pretty amazing.”

There’s a pregnant silence that fills the air for minute. Zayn takes another drag on his cigarette, and when Harry doesn’t say anything for a while, he starts to wonder if he’s just going to brag about how much his life has improved without him there. He doesn’t though.

Instead, he surprises him.

“I’m really sorry Zayn.”

He doesn’t need any more to know what Harry’s talking about. He knows he’s apologizing for kicking him out that night, but he’s also sorry for how things had turned out. He’s sorry that they didn’t end it sooner, before the screaming and horrible fights every night. He’s sorry that they’re no longer speaking because they tried to force something more out of a very good friendship.

“It’s okay,” Zayn says, surprising himself.

And honestly, it was. He’s glad that Harry kicked him out that night, because if he hadn’t he would have never met Liam. If they had separated any time sooner, he wouldn’t have coincidentally met the boy that was so perfect for him that it seemed like they were just made for each other.

“I missed you,” Harry continues. Zayn knows that he means he misses having him as a friend.

He realized a long time ago that he and Harry were never meant to be. It was neither of their faults, they were just two volatile people that couldn’t mix. They were too different to mesh well together. It was like trying to combine fire and water; you’d only get ashes in the end. They were good friends, and they had plenty of fun times together but Harry wasn’t what he needed. And he couldn’t be what Harry needed. He’s genuinely glad that the curly haired teen has found someone right for him, because Harry deserves to be happy.

Liam chooses that moment to appear.

“Hey babe, are you ready?” He smiles at Harry, who’s standing there slightly awkwardly. “Is this your friend? Hi, I’m Liam,” he introduces, reaching out to shake his hand.

“I’m Harry.” He turns to Zayn. “Well, I should get going now. It was nice seeing you again.”

He nods in return, watching as the curly haired teen turns around to walk away.

When they depart, the raven haired teen is happy to say they do so as friends. It’s not stated outright, but he just knows. He knows that he still has Harry’s number somewhere in his contact list, and Harry has his. And maybe one day he’ll have the courage to call him up and they can have a drink together, or maybe he’ll finally meet this Louis person, and Harry can really get to know Liam. Maybe they can all be friends, and life will go back to simpler times.

He thinks he loves Harry more when they aren’t together (in a completely platonic way of course). Harry will probably always be a special person to him. He can’t say his first love because what they had wasn’t love, not the romantic kind, but he’ll always have a place in his heart. It’ll never be as anything more than a really good friend, but he thinks that they’re both okay with that.

Zayn wraps an arm around Liam’s shoulder, and as the sandy haired teen melts against him, he thinks once more about the parallels between Liam and Harry. They mirror each other in a lot of things they do, but they’ll never intersect because they’re just so different.

And that’s probably a good thing.


End file.
